What do you want?

Here is a little conversation I had the other day with an extremely cranky Landon....

Mom: Would you like a drink of milk?
Landon: No!
Mom: Should we go and read a book?
Landon: No.
Mom: Do you want to watch TV?
Landon: No!
Mom: How about a cracker?
Landon: Nooooooo
Mom: Well, what do you want?
Landon: Hmmm.....a haircut.

And, so, he got a haircut. He needed one anyways.

Things that make you go hmmm...

So last night Eric took his Young Men on a hike. He has a favorite trail near our home that he frequents. After hiking for a while the boys and their leaders stopped to rest. While they were sitting there enjoying the view, a conversation happened that went a little something like this:

YM Leader: Eric, do you come here very often?
Eric: Yeah, pretty frequently.
YM Leader: So...would this happen to be your electric razor?
Eric: (dazed and totally confused) Yes! Where did you find that?
YM Leader: Over there on the ground.
Eric: I've been looking for this for 2 months!

That's right. Last night while hiking on the mountainside Eric found the electric razor he has been searching for for the past 2 months! The case was a little sun bleached but other than that it was in perfect working condition. Just don't ask how it got there.

"Faith is like a little seed: If planted it will grow..."

Once upon a time Eric wanted to teach 3-year-old Allie a hands on FHE lesson on faith. He equated faith to a seed and taught Allie how if a seed is nourished and nurtured it will grow. I generously offered up a few visual aids that consisted of: some seeds, a picture of the sun, a watering can, and some fertile soil. Eric was not interested in such a standardized way of teaching this fundamental principle. No way! He was going to make this lesson fun and unique. So, instead of my well thought out props he utilized these:

And then a few days later we had this:

And, even better still, a few weeks later I got to overhear Allie telling her Primary teacher that "We have a faith. It grows hair." Unfortunately, things got worse when a few more weeks down the road Allie's story changed to: "We had a faith, it died." And that was it. The individuals who were given this tidbit of information from Allie got little else in the way of an explanation. Allie was scarred for years (and that is no exaggeration!) and has only recently truly grasped what faith is and how object lessons work. I'm not sure if Eric learned his lesson, he still defends his teaching tactics to this day. I, however, learned my lesson. All object lessons must have my approval before they are shared with the children. I love you Eric!

Grandma Swain better hope that Allie is not as psychic as she thinks she is!

Allie recently had a dream that her Grandma Swain had six more babies. Allie called them "sixlets". One of them was a girl and five were boys. She was not pleased when I told her that I really didn't think this was going to happen. I was told "You don't know that. And besides, you should hope it happens because Grandma would be so happy. She likes children." I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy...and especially not on my 68 year old mother-in-law! Babies are great, but 6 at once? That sounds like a lot of work.

Another Edition of Allie (Unintentionally) Insulting Her Parents Intelligence

So tonight Allie was asking me questions about when Landon was a newborn baby. Here's a little portion of the conversation:
Me: "Landon used to sleep a lot during the day and then he would be awake all night long".
Allie: "Mom, are you trying to tell me he was nocturnal? If you are, you can just say it. I'm very smart. I know what the word nocturnal means!"
Me: "Ummmm, okay. I guess he was nocturnal."
Allie (sympathetically): "Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I should have known that you might not know what that word means. When something is nocturnal it stays up all night."
Me: "I know what the word means."
Allie: "Of course you do now that I've told you. You're welcome."

Lucky for me, Eric was her next target. She told me that in just a few years she would be caught up to Eric in school and that she would be more than happy to tutor him. She was even thinking that maybe they could graduate from college together. How's that for motivation Eric?

A Little Something To Make You Laugh

Landon has finally finished cutting teeth (for now). We are all very happy. Enjoy this video of Landon just being Landon. He has the funniest little laugh! (Keep a close eye on what his belly does when he really gets going.)

Should I Be Offended?

Yesterday morning Allie put on a pair of shoes that I have been trying to get rid of for some time now. She came and found me and said that they were too small and that I should pass them on to her cousin Camille. I told her to put them in the kitchen and that I would take care of it. We continued with our morning routine and as I met Allie at the back door to send her off to school I saw this:

I asked Allie why she left me a note and she said: "Well, Mom, I've heard that old people have a hard time remembering things". I told her that I am NOT old. To which she replied: "Well, you will be. You are turning 30 on your next birthday".

While I'm on a roll...

Here is another Allie funny for you. Eric's family has a tendency to be a little bit on the tardy side. And by that I mean family parties and functions generally start 1-2 hours after the announced beginning time. It is something that I have learned to accept and to plan around. I can even laugh about it now. Allie has yet to learn this fine art. A few weeks ago she was waiting for a cousin to come over for a sleepover and she sat staring at the clock literally counting the seconds until she would arrive. When her guest was 5 minutes late she was ready to start making phone calls. By the time she was 15 minutes late Allie was pacing around the house driving us crazy. Finally, Allie came up to me with a big grin on her face and announced that she had discovered the solution to the tardiness problem. Here's how the conversation went:

Allie: Mom I know how to make sure that everyone in the Swain family is on time from now on.
Me: Really? Let's hear it...
Allie: Well, since we obviously don't live in the same time zones, maybe we could talk about which time zone we are telling time by when we plan our parties. Then we would all know what time we are actually starting things at.
Me: Oh, that is a good idea.

She might be on to something here. Maybe I'll suggest it the next time a family party is planned?